Why blog? Why write down your daily thoughts in public view? Well who knows, I have owned a few blogs in the past, some business and some personal. I think there are times in your life where putting thought to paper (or keyboard as it were) is a cathartic process. Many many years ago I wrote diary style during a relationship in my early twenties. I still have those journals. Yet I don’t look back and read through what I wrote when I was 22 years old, but maybe my daughter has!
I know not to throw away or burn any of this… someone near and dear to me in the past did such a thing and told me how regretful they were for doing that. So I won’t. Anything of a truly personal nature I will password protect – some things are meant for certain eyes only.
Anger, hope, love, peace, reflection, resurrection, sadness, joy are all put down here. Like a picture of my swampy pool on a rainy day, made me hope for spring. FaceBook is a bit too traffic laden a place to deposit all of one’s thoughts, and a blog fits nicely into what one sometimes needs as a vehicle to articulate said thoughts.
I don’t get too personal with family/personal life here, but those who would know could know what I am talking about… sometimes. Life has many twists and turns, and at this stage of life I have gained allot of wisdom though on the surface (and in my heart) I have lost so much over the past few years. It is interesting to note that every significant person in my life over the past 10 years is gone now, or the relationship has markedly changed, starting back in June of 2007 right up to this past fall. It is what it is… I cared deeply for everyone of them, in their own way.
What you truly hope to never lose is your children. That’s it. Relationships come and go, friends are there and fade away, but being a parent is a lifetime job. Even if it isn’t a full time job any longer. And there are many major lessons about children that this ol’ man has learned through this period of time. There are some decisions anyone regrets, but the big decisions I cannot tell anyone I really do. Foolish to look in the rearview mirror and say ‘oh I would have not done this or that’ remember those moments: some major decisions you ponder but it was the ONLY choice you wanted to make. The only choice you could make.
I think the guiding principals anyone adopts through life and holds dear is the result of challenging times and times of great growth. I have grown immensely. That never ends. My one major failure point in life I know so much more about, even if I will never venture down that road again. I must stay true to some guiding principles… seek them out if you don’t have them, and you will be fine.
